Family Life

Chapter Two-What a Shock

Lasting Impact 4 years ago 3 min read

Chapter Two-What a Shock

As an avid reader, I took interest in the subject of relationships and marriage early in life. Long ago, I accepted the fact that it was an area of calling so I treated it as such. Any information on courtship, dating, and marriage was a delight. I was just hungry for KNOWLEDGE.

Then came the year 2008, and I bought a book written by Rev. Dr. Samuel Kissiedu. The title of the book read: ‘WHY WE MARRY AND WHO IS THE HEAD OF THE HOME’. I read that book as if it was a textbook and I was amazed by the reasons the author gave for marriage.

Out of all the reasons, the one that made the most impression on me was this; ONE OF THE REASONS WHY WE MARRY IS FOR CHARACTER TRAINING. WHAT? Character training in marriage? I was shocked.

Could this be true? That I have rough edges of character in my own life and marriage is one of the avenues through which my character can be refined?

After finishing the book, I concluded that MARRIAGE IS WORK. I remember writing in the book this statement. MARRIAGE SHOULD BE SPELLED W.O.R.K. I was 25 years old at that time. I can say with all honesty that Dr. Samuel Kissiedu was right and the discovery I also made was on point.

Chapter Two-What a Shock

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So, we entered marriage with the mentality that it is work and hard work for that matter. If you are not ready for this kind of work, don’t bother to marry. You will do yourself a great disservice if you are interested in marriage with no work consciousness in mind.

All we will be sharing in this book are the several aspects of the work of marriage. Character training for example is work. The offenses of your wife or your husband are the avenue through which you learn to be forgiving, tolerant, and patient.

Chapter Two-What a Shock

Your character is refined as you work on your marriage. Apostle Paul has counsel about this. He said those who are strong in the Lord should bear with one another’s weaknesses. Read it for yourself:

“We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.” -Romans15:1

In all honesty, this is one of the most difficult aspects of marriage. It is hard for singles to take until they enter into marriage. This is where your lust, greed, your anger, and intolerance will be exposed. For now, you can pride yourself to be patient and very forgiving. I will take that with a pinch of salt. The weakness of your spouse will be a major litmus test

In the next chapter, we are going to look at apologizing to your spouse though you feel you are right.